1st Quarter 2009
Episodes 496, 497, 498, 499, 500, 501, 502, 503

Note: The first episode of this quarter was transmitted on December 22, 2008.

Episode #496: You Lost Your Goldfish
First Broadcast: 12/29/08
Economic meltdowns to the left of me! Ponzi schemes to the right of me! What is the difference between a recession and a depression? Weren't those bundled mortgage securities essentially a Ponzi scheme also? Why not give those "junk" securities to bank executives as their bonuses this year? And why won't President-Elect Obama take a more rational position on changing the insane drug laws in this country? Things to think about for the new year!

Episode #497: It's About Time You Did Your Share
First Broadcast: 1/12/09
"Third" parties, how the country has gone downhill under George W. Bush, one of the last dickish moves Bush could make, and what a big inauguration it's going to be. P.S.: Did you know that "Joe the Plumber" is going to be a "war correspondent" in Israel for the time being? I think I'll stick to more reliable news sources, thank you.

Episode #498: You Want the Cannon
First Broadcast: 1/19/09
Repeated: 4/20/09; 4/19/10
The late Patrick McGoohan and the late Ricardo Montalban dominate our episode this week, mostly regarding their roles as The Prisoner and Khan Noonian Singh in Star Trek II, respectively. Did you know they both had a Bacon number of 2, in addition to both being villains in separate Columbo episodes? Two great losses to acting, when all we're left with are actors who don't quite, um, act, really. (Where's Charlton Heston when you need him?)

Episode #499: White House Casual
First Broadcast: 2/2/09
Repeated: 3/16/09
So, in the very brief time that President Barack Obama has been in office so far, he has suspended the trials at Guantanamo Bay, ordered the prisons at Guantanamo Bay to be closed within a year, told the Joint Chiefs of Staff to find a way to withdraw all troops from Iraq within 16 months, directed all Cabinet agencies to respect the Freedom of Information Act, repealed the Global Gag Rule on abortion, asked the EPA to allow states to have higher fuel efficiency requirements than the federal government, selected an Attorney General nominee who agrees that waterboarding is torture, and has instituted a more laid-back atmosphere in the White House in general. Our reaction? Personally, I've viewed Presidents with more than a little suspicion during my entire life, so to see a President doing things that I actually agree with... well, it's a new sensation, to say the least. Will it last the entire four (or eight?) years of his term? I hesitate to speculate. He certainly has nowhere to go but up from the last occupant.

Episode #500: Of Its Own Entropic Accord
First Broadcast: 2/16/09
Repeated: 4/6/09; 6/22/09; 2/8/10; 10/25/10; 5/9/11; 9/16/13
As the off-screen typist delves into an existentialist crisis over the significance of this program's 500th episode, visions of the Universe fill the screen. Will the meaning of Earth's existence become clear sometime before the end of everything as we know it? Or will everyone stop to get a burger instead? I think the odds are great that episode #501 will arrive before any of those other mysteries are revealed.

Episode #501: In The Year 2525, Will Free New York Still Be Alive?
First Broadcast: 2/23/09
Repeated: 8/3/09
After accurately predicting Heath Ledger's Oscar win for Best Supporting Actor, we discuss some other details about this year's Academy Awards, along with a New York Post cartoon that is just stupid on all counts. Small subjects; big dialogue.

Episode #502: Good Enough For California
First Broadcast: 3/2/09
Obama's speech! The GOP's sorry excuse for a response by Bobby Jindal! Index funds, and why they don't suck! Bernie Madoff! And the latest proposal in California to legalize and tax marijuana, an idea more popular than every so-called Republican leader, and an idea which could also generate $1 billion of new revenue in California every year! Maybe things are looking up!

Episode #503: Completely Unglued
First Broadcast: 3/9/09
Repeated: 5/11/09 Audio was overmodulated.
Right-wing freak Glenn Beck thinks America is headed for a civil war--and so does some Russian professor making a living lecturing about it. Rush Limbaugh thinks bipartisanship "is [Democrats] being forced to agree with us after we politically have cleaned their clocks and beaten them." George W. Bush thought it was OK to violate almost every aspect of the Constitution where suspected terrorists are concerned--the definition of a suspected terrorist being defined by the White House, of course. Maybe those are just a few of the reasons why Republican "leaders" are still less popular than marijuana legalization, and maybe that popularity is contributing to the recent effort to scale back of archaic drug laws in Illinois and New York. Not to mention that people in general are still smart enough to not blame President Obama for the current economic meltdown--you know, the one that started before the election? I wonder how long this craziness will continue...

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